Prohibits most uses of federal funds to buy, give away, or produce promotional “swag” and to create or use mascots for agency promotion, while listing narrow exceptions for mission-related programs, recruitment, the Census, and certain military or otherwise-authorized mascots. It also requires each federal agency to report its public relations and advertising spending (and an optional estimate of return on investment) in its annual budget justification to Congress, and directs OMB to issue implementing regulations within 180 days of enactment.